A few weeks ago I had a dream in which Steven Spielberg told me I should read War and Peace, by Leo Tolstoy, so I am. Here's what I notice about the society Tolstoy writes about in the beginning of this epic, they don't cook or clean. The "society" people don't, the servants do everything.
When I was growing up, I had a servant too, it was great. Breakfast, lunch and dinner were always prepared, and when at home, served beautifully at the table. She did the laundry, ironed, kept the house orderly...yes, it was my Mom. Now we did have a housekeeper that came I think once a week (we had a big house), but my Mom did everything else.
In college I remember cooking dinner for my boyfriend, doing his laundry, until one day it dawned on me that we were both in college and why was I playing this role? I so got my dander up, and decided then and there, I wasn't going to play the same role as my Mom.
Thus, even today as I look at the plain work it takes to take care of a home, I still feel that it isn't noble work, but a servants work to do. Intellectually I know this isn't true -except I happen to be reading War and Peace where it is true - I just haven't actually gotten to where I really believe this is a noble way to live. The real people are out participating in the world, away from home, and home is the secondary place to be...a place to restore, revitalize oneself to go back out to the real i.e. important/valuable world.
It never ceases to amaze me how much of what I experience is simply an outpicturing of my habitual thought patterns, created over many years of life.
What about all of you? Do you feel the nobility of taking care of a home and providing meals 3 times a day, every day?
Oh and...when we know the power of visualization in co-creating our lives, why are films created and watched, that are like nuclear bombs for our souls?
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Honey, what time is dinner?
ReplyDeleteI do meals, laundry, homework, bills, etc.... and work full time. ugh. i'm a go-getter, ask Jack. Although romantically, I would love to be a full time stay at home mom, I don't think I'd be fully satisfied. I would like, however to be wealthy enough to have that be an option.
ReplyDeleteOh, Jack, you are SO in trouble for that comment!!
ReplyDeleteI tried staying home full time and we all decided it was better if I worked. We share most things (I do the cooking, though). My latest rant has been that my husband will very kindly fold the laundry -- all except for my stuff!! What is UP with that???
I see mothering my kids as noble, but I'm not so sure about cooking and cleaning.....
Thanks for your responses Amy and Lisa...I guess I'm not saying either/or with staying home and working...but just focusing on the "at home" part, since the working part has gotten so much of my attention over the years. What I'm wondering is if I can get to a place beyond mere functionality of what needs to get done at home to doing it with as much conscious intention...even love...as I do ministry/work?
ReplyDeleteJack - dinner was great last night, wish you could've joined us. :)
ReplyDeletehmmm....this book - the spiritual tasks of the homemaker http://www.steinerbooks.org/detail.html?id=9780904693843 was very helpful to me in gaining that sense with house work...where i stumble, sometimes literally, is in deciding how much tweens need to be 'responsible for' their stuff, which is left asunder and astray about the common areas of the house...i am happy to dust and vacuum, picking up dirty socks from the floor and from between sofa cushions and food/trash that's not suppose to be in that room ever, not so much.
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