Integral Spirituality

For those of you who don't know, there is a theory articulated by Ken Wilber called integral theory. It is a map that connects all theories, all disciplines, all cultures, all types of everything. It's incredibly elucidating for anyone who has the time to learn it. You can start at http://www.kenwilber.com/ and follow pertinent links.

I bring this all up because we are in the season of magic for young children, and I write primarily about those raised in the Christian tradition, since that is what I know. Though I have lit the Chanukah's candles at my transdemoninational spiritual center, it's not the same as being raised in that religion (though I did go to a Jewish Montessori that taught Hebrew and celebrated the Jewish holidays).

Right now Julian is thinking about Santa Claus and elves, as well as his superheroes. Now it could be said, and has been said, that to engage in this magical world of Santa Claus with him is not treating him rationally, it's a form lying to a child.

However, what I now see that is a perspective derived entirely from a rational worldview, that discounts other worldviews.

What developmentists are now saying is that each stage a child goes through - including magic, then mythic - has to be experienced and integrated fully before going on to the next stage of development. If not, parts of the child gets split off, disassociated from, and will be stumbling blocks for the person for the rest of their life. In other words, no stage can be skipped.

Thus, it is actually my responsibility as a parent to engage in magical thinking with my child, make it okay, playful, something to be embraced. Then one day he naturally start asking questions, and the shift to the mythic stage of development begins to happen, then it is my responsibility to meet him there.

All of this is on my mind as President Obama commits more troops to Afghanistan. I'm not as upset about this as I used to be. Generally speaking it is people at the mythic stage of development, and some rational stage, that fight these wars...and since 70% of the world is still ethnocentric (mythic or below), these wars will still be needed - as ugly as they are.

As I read War and Peace, the joy, the passion, the total commitment of the men of Russia to serve in the military, to fight Napoleon (and aren't we glad they did?) is experienced as honor, not as a horror. The horror that we now know go with war as experienced on TV, is a stage of development, a perspective, that most of the world's population (including my son) don't share. Even as Tolstoy and Hemingway fought in wars and then are horrified by them, they are not in the majority. So many men who have fought in wars feel the honor in doing so, and would do it again, if called by their country.

Just as I HAVE to meet Julian where he is (abstract rational thinking isn't possible in most kids until about 11 or 12), I recognize we have to meet the world where it is, on it's terms. We can still try negotiation - but how well does sitting down and have diplomatic conversations with a 5 yr. old work if they don't think you're going to back up your perspective with definitive action?

I open my heart to all the perspectives of this world, and in Julian, and ask to serve each in the Highest Vibration of Love and Wisdom as I am capable.


Oh and...had a great conversation today with a friend about professional sports and how only the select have the millions, that majority aren't getting paid that high...and yet the parental pressure to create brilliant athletes is unrelenting. I have been assuming it is the hope of the millions that is the motivation for these parents...but if that's not it, what is?